Loans - FAFSA

Dear London,

Not that I feel like is it entirely appropriate to talk about money in a public setting, I do want to make a note on my loan process, because this is a very difficult thing for me to accomplish. It could be just me, but I have heard many complaints from many people about taking out loans. Yes, I have filled out my application, but when I go to the website it will not let me look at the actual application that I have filled out. It says I need to update my Adobe, SO I did that, but I still cannot see the document. I used their online chat for help, and the sum of all the answers I received was: Ask your university... Which obviously made me wonder what questions they were there to answer.

Now I have sent a follow up email to someone at Kingston University, basically telling him I am useless. I am hoping that by telling him what I want for my Stafford loan and my PLUS loan we can begin the beginning of the end of this process. I know exactly how much I would like to have in my bank account before I head overseas, I just need someone to put it in there. I feel like it should be that simple, don't they want the profit of my interest on these giant loans?

There is also a debate raging in my head of what order this is all supposed to happen. When do I find housing? I need to know how much I will be paying monthly for a flat, so I can add that onto the final amount of my loan request. I also need to have the money in my account and an address in the United Kingdom when trying to apply for my Visa. Not to mention, I need the CAS letter for my visa, which I will not get until I finish all the work for my loans. AND I need to have my visa before I head overseas, which I would like to do sooner than later so I can find a place to live... I should really draw this out in a circle digram, so I can map out the craziness of this process. It makes me wonder if I am the only one stuck in this trap of deadline and prerequisites.

I hope not.

Anyway, as a person I do need to relax and let things role as they should. I am just really afraid that I will miss something and not be able to go this year. I would be heartbroken. Right now, I just have to wait to hear back from the university from that email. More than anything, I hope they get back to me within this week so that I can move onto the next step.

And as a complete side-note, none of this is made easier with the loss of my best friend and dog for the last 13 years, Kochanie. I feel like if I could just cuddle with her for awhile, I would calm down and de-stress. I miss her so much...

For now, I am going to try and breath.

Somewhere between Belgium and Amsterdam: Fall 2009, Photographer: Kristin Bergene

xx, Kristin